I am excited. About a lot of things. Really fun things on the horizon, and happening right now. It’s been a tough semester (because now I group my life into semesters for both work and school).
The beacon of light for me this semester has been our Lake Placid Camp in June. The mere thought of riding through the beautiful mountains has me weak in the knees. Waking up and having coffee on the deck overlooking Whiteface….. has my heart. Once that moment can happen, I can relax.
Before that I am finishing my final semester of grad school and walking across the stage. Earning my masters of Nursing Education was something I never really thought I could do (never mind while being mom, wife, working full time, running a business, working per diem in Peds ED , teaching yoga and staying fit). I have had a lot of help and a lot of support along the way. Curt and Luc have been the wind beneath my wings. I haven’t missed anything in terms of family…. I don’t even know how.
Long ago I gave up the idea that life should have this magical zen balance to it. It doesn’t exist. I don’t roll out of bed into a morning yoga practice drinking a kale smoothie with my dog sitting at the edge of my mat. It’s a lot messier than that. Try dragging my ass onto my bike at 4am coffee in hand and hanging on for dear life.
If you learn to exist in chaos, learn to stand in the eye of the storm…. then you will be fine. Trust me.
Because one Masters degree isn’t enough…. I am beginning my Family Nurse Practitioner to Doctorate track this coming September. Lucky for me this Masters placed me 3/4 of the way through the FNP. So I am ahead of the game!
Marathon training is coming along great. I am up to 20 miles a week, nice and easy. I am on the bike almost daily and now that spring has sprung I am on the cross bike. WHY didn’t I get a cross bike sooner? I have even signed up for Mountain Biking 101. I have a great mountain bike, but please…. I am a poser. Thanks to Alexa’s help I have flat pedals on the way, and I will master the dirt. We have SO many mountain bike options around here and frankly…. I am tired of the roads. I have ridden them SO. DAMN. LONG. More than that….. I am tired of my friends getting killed.
Share the damn road. Look the hell UP when you are driving. I am tired of it.
At 43 years old I am DIGGING learning new skills and new things. Since I turned 40 I have added speed skating, cross country skiing, downhill skiing, cross biking, paddleboarding…. and more. I love the feeling of mastery. I love getting out there and falling flat on my ass. It’s when we fall that we get back up.
Between all of this, paddleboarding, my athletes completely rocking what they are accomplishing, our students graduating, watching Luc continue to beat the odds with hard work and passion for what he does, and so much more to come……. the future looks good.
I work my ass off to allow myself to never live in the past. Between mistakes I have made, losses I have been through….. the past is an easy place to get stranded. Memories of people, moments and lessons can grip you forever and not allow you to move forward.
I think of people, memories, and lessons as charms that we put on our life bracelet. We take them with us wherever we go, but we can’t have them back. We cry, we mourn, we wish….. but we have to let them go. We have to let them guide our future as it is now. Not then.
That’s what this learning is all about. Through new adventures (and education I suppose) I move forward, with my charm bracelet on, bringing all the beautiful things and people that are not with us anymore.
Because if all of those beautiful souls throught for a second that I couln’t move forward becasue of them, trust me they’d give me the biggest kick in the ass.
So forward we go.