I am not one to do a lot of looking back. My colleague Heather used to say “The rearview mirror is small, and the windshield is big for a reason.” I look back at the things in life that should be reflected on. But I don’t spend long there. What did I do, what could I do better?
I don’t measure the year in miles that I swam, biked or ran. I don’t measure the year in who I lost, or who I gained. I don’t measure the year at all in fact. I am aware that this is one of my faults and one of my assets. But I like myself this way so I choose not do anything to change it!
I am at such a interesting time of life. Our son will graduate from high school and begin college. That transition will be seismic for all of us, for a variety of reasons. We have one more CSE meeting to go, I never thought these would come to an end. Now we teach Luc how to navigate and advocate for himself as he enters a new environment.
After 4 1/2 years in Nursing Education, earning my Masters and working a ton, I am settling down. I will begin teaching in the course I dreamt of teaching in, starting in January. I am at the college I dreamt of teaching at, and on the team I have dreamt of being on. I have struggled and stumbled with what to do next, if anything. I have been accepted into a Doctorate program, and I don’t really need to pursue it. I was going to start in April but I think I might push that to Sept, or off indefinitely. Tomorrow, I may decide to keep pushing for it as planned.
When you arrive at the destination point, the place you have had your sights on for so long, it’s a strange place. I am ‘just’ teaching and coaching a small number of athletes. I have time again. I am working on shifting from having that big goal as a carrot in front of me, towards being the best teacher I can be for my students. Stay tuned on the Doctorate.
Athletically I am shifting too. From the Ironman life to the short course life. The biggest difference is more focused training. Ironman training is definitely focused but I chose not to really dial in and focus if that makes sense. It was a safe goal and I knew if I put in the work I would achieve the goal. This season I have set the goal to dial in more, to focus more, and that’s meant looking at paces and power and data more carefully. Heck I am even on Strava. Catch up with me there if you want! Finally, a place where I feel great about talking about all things training with people who love it equally. I even post photos. It’s so fun!!!!!
Rather than saying I am shifting from Ironman to short course, it’s really I am shifting from a very safe goal and going through the motions, to dialing in, paying attention, and taking some athletic risks.
I turn 45 this year and I am lucky beyond belief that I have been in this sport for over 2 decades. My resume here is solid and something I never compare the current version of myself to. I don’t know if that came when I turned 40, or with maturity. Maybe both!!!!!!
I will not come into 2019 with a list of things I want to eliminate from my life or from myself. I come into 2019 with a big list of adventure and things I want to do and see. I don’t have some well scripted words of inspiration to share about crossing the line into 2019. Maybe it’s because I do my best to live the best life I can every single day. Sometimes I nail it, sometimes I fail miserably at it. I learn from both and that’s what I will always continue to do.
The best advice or inspiration I can give are words I didn’t write:
“Life is too short to wake up with regrets. So love the people who treat you
right. Forget about those who don’t. Believe everything happens for a reason. If you get a chance, take it. If it changes your life, let it.
Nobody said life would be easy, they just promised it would most likely be worth it.”
Thank you for being in my life. Whether we are connected through social media, nursing, triathlon, our past lives, or our future ones, I am grateful beyond measure for the light you bring into my life.
Here is to 2019, let’s make this happen!!!!!!!!